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31 Retro Problems Former Myspace Users Can Relate To

Logging in hoping to see this:


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But actually having no new comments, friend requests, messages or picture comments.

Then having to post an ambiguous bulletin about feeling sad in the hope that someone would comment on your pictures.


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Desperate times called for desperate measures.


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But then getting a picture comment and having to return it, when you had literally nothing to say.


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Agonising over who should go where in your top 8.


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LIKE SERIOUSLY, IS IT OK FOR YOUR BOYFRIEND TO GO AHEAD OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?


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Being forced to rearrange your top 8 in a passive aggressive display of annoyance.


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Top 8s then going completely out of fashion so having to remove it altogether.


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Lying on quizzes in the hope your crush would see and get the message.


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Almost having a heart attack when your crush came online.


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Having to apply a full face of makeup just to take new profile pics.

Taking literally hundreds of potential profile pics and having to go through them individually to decide which was best.

Or taking hundreds of profile pics and NONE of them looking good.


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Or one being perfect apart from your fucking gappy side-fringe.


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Your family needing the digital camera so you couldn’t take ANY profile pics at all.


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Struggling with the timer on your camera when attempting to take a full body shot.

Having to alter your profile pics with a programme other than Photoshop because you couldn’t afford it.

So that basically meant altering the contrast and exposure so your pictures looked like this.


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Changing your profile pic and being annoyed if you didn’t get loads of comments immediately.


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Searching through hundreds of bands to find the perfect profile song.


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Spending AGES listing all your favourite bands in alphabetical order somewhere on your profile.


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Having to learn A LOT of html in order to get your profile looking amazing.


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Having to copy and paste your entire html profile into Notepad before making any changes just in case something went wrong.

Being secretly jealous of people who were MySpace Whores, or “famous” on MySpace.


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Having to downplay your excitement when you actually met one of them.


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Feeling awkward when you met someone who looked nothing like their profile pic.


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Admiring people’s piercings – especially Snakebites – and tattoos but not being allowed to get any yourself.


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Needing to up the number of “friends” you had, so spending hours adding complete randoms.

Sending someone a really important message, seeing that they’d read it but not receiving a reply.


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And finally, being so sad when everyone waved goodbye to MySpace and hello to Facebook.


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